Honestly speaking, my emotions fluctuated up and down a lot during this camp, but the mask hindered the emotional break-down times well, and fortunately no one actually realized. However, overall, it's an awesome camp for it was a time for me to calm my heart and seek the direction instructed by Him.
The companion of emptiness is a fearful one. Sometimes, we really question His ways.
I've never wondered whether God's direction was the best, but at intervals, I do doubt whether they are best for me.
I somehow got His answer regarding this uncertainty.
As humans, I am pretty sure we sometimes don't even know what we want, and which path is appropriate for us. However, there is good news.
God knows us, His understanding of us is beyond what you imagine, He knows us more than we know ourselves and therefore He chooses the best possible out of us. If we decide to ignore His calling and refuse to live according to His ways, we might obtain something we desire presently but spend the rest of our lives regretting having it.
It is a difficult choice to make and maybe unreasonable in human perspective, and I myself fail to listen many times, but I am sure, God is good all the time, and He awaits for us to come back to Him.
I therefore would like to thank God for every situations I'm put through, and apologize that I might still need His patience for sometime, to enable me to once again put that armor on. In Jesus Name, Amen.
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