Regrets

At this moment of life, I am feeling super regretful of the decisions I've made.

Stupid, persistent ones to make my life more miserable than it already is.

Thank goodness I am leaving Malaysia soon, I need a break from all these nonsense, I need a new fresh life to explore, and not to be told what I should or should not do, what I am and what I am not, what I am suppose to be and what I am not suppose to be.

Seriously, peace OFF!

The only thing I am concern about is in what light God sees me, anyone else, please try to refrain from judging or assuming me on irrelevant matters. If it's necessary for the good of the majority, spit it out, other wise, just kindly STOP. I have more issues to be concern about than being bothered my whole entire time about what you think.

And the fact that I can hardly control myself from not taking it personally, please just don't say what a normal nice guy wouldn't say and we might just be friends.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Testimony

To me, testimonies are wonderful, they are just a piece of master art.
Like seriously, how can you not like hearing one's experience with God?

Thanks to my friend Mr. Chiun, I watched a youtubed testimony of Pastor Jaeson Ma, and it was awesome. I cried like a baby, cause I knew that perseverance and faith would lead you to the eternal treasures God has promised.

Despite Your past, God loves You.

There was one verse I took down,
Nothing you do can make God love you more, yet nothing you do not do will make God love you less.

That's love man. That's love.

And that's all that you need.

Lost

I don't know since when and why I started feeling this.....
I don't know when I could get over it........
I don't know who caused it.......
But I know, I am not joyous now, neither sad thou.

The only time I can find complete contentment is when I am with You, when I worship You....
During this time, I feel wanted, I feel tightly held, I do not feel like I need to keep striving for approval, keep striving towards the seemingly unachievable worldly standards.

You made me who I am Lord, and You know what's best for me.
And from experience, I know much patience and endurance is required....
Lead me Lord, far from the old me, I desperately need a change, and more importantly I need You.

I am afraid Lord, I am..... Just worried that someday I would not have the strength to carry on.
Every step I take Lord, I pray it would take me closer to You.
I pray that all that struggle I am going through right now Lord, would lead me to the cross, to the eternal treasures You've promised.
And from experience once again, I have faith that it is true.

Please try to go a little easier on me, I am feeling fragile, and I know I would break, anytime....
Send me angels Lord, angels that understands me inside out, who speak faith and courage into my soul, who would willingly be my sword, and my shield, and everything I need to fight the battle... Angels who would lift me and prevent me from falling from the cliff of life.

All this I ask in Jesus Name, Amen.