Honestly speaking, my emotions fluctuated up and down a lot during this camp, but the mask hindered the emotional break-down times well, and fortunately no one actually realized. However, overall, it's an awesome camp for it was a time for me to calm my heart and seek the direction instructed by Him.
The companion of emptiness is a fearful one. Sometimes, we really question His ways.
I've never wondered whether God's direction was the best, but at intervals, I do doubt whether they are best for me.
I somehow got His answer regarding this uncertainty.
As humans, I am pretty sure we sometimes don't even know what we want, and which path is appropriate for us. However, there is good news.
God knows us, His understanding of us is beyond what you imagine, He knows us more than we know ourselves and therefore He chooses the best possible out of us. If we decide to ignore His calling and refuse to live according to His ways, we might obtain something we desire presently but spend the rest of our lives regretting having it.
It is a difficult choice to make and maybe unreasonable in human perspective, and I myself fail to listen many times, but I am sure, God is good all the time, and He awaits for us to come back to Him.
I therefore would like to thank God for every situations I'm put through, and apologize that I might still need His patience for sometime, to enable me to once again put that armor on. In Jesus Name, Amen.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
Feelings of A Non-Business Material Student Before Exam
I just wanna sing....
It's hard for I have like 18 hours to my exam and I haven't done studying........
With no desires to progress.....
It's hard for I have like 18 hours to my exam and I haven't done studying........
With no desires to progress.....
Friday, September 4, 2009
Pride
Seriously, when I think back of the incidences I've been through, I thank God for forgiving me, I was unworthy, foolish......
Sometimes as we progress in the Christian Walk, we tend to forget the fundamental basis of being Christians. Today, I got awakened by John of the word HUMBLE.
God is always faithful, He gently awaits us to have this intimate love relationship with Him.
Sometime ago, I was questioning about my experience and walk with God, for that somethings haven't been happening for awhile. It's like it vanished all of a sudden, and again it comes back to this word HUMBLE.
John quoted that many worship leaders who initially served God strayed away because of pride. It's when you're in front, that you tend to forget what brought you there.
At the beginning, we all prayed for humility, we prayed for joy, for love, for Godly wisdom. But sooner or later when we experienced God and truly believed in Him, we did not move on the way He intended. On the contrary, we kept asking for more, we desire more good, and we seek recognition.
God takes initiative to have a relationship with us, He wants to achieve His plans through us. We are not the ones to demand, but to listen, to adjust our lives to live in line with His footsteps.
Today in CF, while we worshiped, I saw an endless road in a dry land, with no dividers. My understanding tells me that, God wanted to show me that the Christian path is long, and it is harsh, with no turn-backs, but the far land in front would be promising.
*It looks something like this*
Father Lord, I repent for pride while I serve You, I repent for not being REAL enough towards You. Guide me with the Holy Spirit, feel me with hunger for Your Words, make me HUMBLE at all cost, and never allow me to stray from You. In Jesus' Name, AMEN.
Sometimes as we progress in the Christian Walk, we tend to forget the fundamental basis of being Christians. Today, I got awakened by John of the word HUMBLE.
God is always faithful, He gently awaits us to have this intimate love relationship with Him.
Sometime ago, I was questioning about my experience and walk with God, for that somethings haven't been happening for awhile. It's like it vanished all of a sudden, and again it comes back to this word HUMBLE.
John quoted that many worship leaders who initially served God strayed away because of pride. It's when you're in front, that you tend to forget what brought you there.
At the beginning, we all prayed for humility, we prayed for joy, for love, for Godly wisdom. But sooner or later when we experienced God and truly believed in Him, we did not move on the way He intended. On the contrary, we kept asking for more, we desire more good, and we seek recognition.
God takes initiative to have a relationship with us, He wants to achieve His plans through us. We are not the ones to demand, but to listen, to adjust our lives to live in line with His footsteps.
Today in CF, while we worshiped, I saw an endless road in a dry land, with no dividers. My understanding tells me that, God wanted to show me that the Christian path is long, and it is harsh, with no turn-backs, but the far land in front would be promising.
*It looks something like this*
Father Lord, I repent for pride while I serve You, I repent for not being REAL enough towards You. Guide me with the Holy Spirit, feel me with hunger for Your Words, make me HUMBLE at all cost, and never allow me to stray from You. In Jesus' Name, AMEN.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Purpose
As you all know, I participated in 30 Hour Famine awhile ago. For me, it's a wonderful experience and I really thank God for giving me wonderful group mates which comprises of 7 fellas from SMK Seafield, Jenny from Help Psychology, Jennifer (Jenny's sister), and Angeline. It was awesome to see some familiar church faces, like Jin Yin, Wyman, Melody, Arnold and of course the inviter John.
The games are pretty meaningful and seriously through it I know I was molded for a purpose. For those who didn't come, too bad, but you can share the joy by looking at this team as they finished their huts they were suppose to live in.
Cool aint it? It's purely made of card boxes, newspaper, and strings. NO JOKES!
For an insight of what I felt, It was never easy being a group leader. The main issue that bothered me was that despite sleeping 2 hours the previous day and all that hunger, I've got to show enthusiasm and appear participative. I would like to say thank you to my group mates for they never blamed me and attended to my lame jokes and sort.
Day time activities were energy consuming but then it all soothes down at night.
See, what I meant by soothing~ LOL~
In the next morning, we were leaving for the concert at Bukit Jalil. In my opinion, it is pretty much chinese dominated, and due to the fact that I am leading an english group, it seemed gloomy. Everyone was tired and hungry, and all I hoped for is that time pass by soon enough that I would not die starving. Seriously, even Ah Mei didn't get me excited. =.=
Deep down my heart, I realize how uncontented we are. The situation out there is getting pretty bad, food crisis is pwndering the whole world and yet some brainless freaks are still worsening the situation with the FUCKIN biofuel development. I know people would think that I am crazy for being mad, but I just can't tolerate a child's laughter being slaughtered by advancement of technology. I would rather have a deserted world filled with happy people.
People out there need help, and you and I can make a difference!! Use our intellectual skills for the correct purpose and shine for God, live to serve as He died serving US!
These children need our help, they deserve the rights to live just as our blessed offsprings. Give them the happiness they need, for even by looking at the smiles of the children triggers tears, for I know it takes more than you imagine to put it on.
The games are pretty meaningful and seriously through it I know I was molded for a purpose. For those who didn't come, too bad, but you can share the joy by looking at this team as they finished their huts they were suppose to live in.
Cool aint it? It's purely made of card boxes, newspaper, and strings. NO JOKES!For an insight of what I felt, It was never easy being a group leader. The main issue that bothered me was that despite sleeping 2 hours the previous day and all that hunger, I've got to show enthusiasm and appear participative. I would like to say thank you to my group mates for they never blamed me and attended to my lame jokes and sort.
Day time activities were energy consuming but then it all soothes down at night.
See, what I meant by soothing~ LOL~In the next morning, we were leaving for the concert at Bukit Jalil. In my opinion, it is pretty much chinese dominated, and due to the fact that I am leading an english group, it seemed gloomy. Everyone was tired and hungry, and all I hoped for is that time pass by soon enough that I would not die starving. Seriously, even Ah Mei didn't get me excited. =.=
Deep down my heart, I realize how uncontented we are. The situation out there is getting pretty bad, food crisis is pwndering the whole world and yet some brainless freaks are still worsening the situation with the FUCKIN biofuel development. I know people would think that I am crazy for being mad, but I just can't tolerate a child's laughter being slaughtered by advancement of technology. I would rather have a deserted world filled with happy people.
People out there need help, and you and I can make a difference!! Use our intellectual skills for the correct purpose and shine for God, live to serve as He died serving US!
These children need our help, they deserve the rights to live just as our blessed offsprings. Give them the happiness they need, for even by looking at the smiles of the children triggers tears, for I know it takes more than you imagine to put it on.
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